Saturday, April 6, 2013

LOVE AND PAIN


What attracts you to other people?

In reality life involves pain

Happiness, we all want it, we all crave it, we all strive for it...but what is this elusive thing we are looking for?
Happiness, we all want it, we all crave it, we all strive for it...but what is this elusive thing we are looking for?
A sense of pleasure, gladness or gratification, that doesn't last?
A sense of pleasure, gladness or gratification, that doesn't last?
The harder we pursue pleasurable feelings the more likely we suffer from anxiety and depression.
The harder we pursue pleasurable feelings the more likely we suffer from anxiety and depression.
What does it mean to live a rich, full and meaningful life?
What does it mean to live a rich, full and meaningful life?
Does it mean take action to cherish the things that truly matter deep in our hearts?
Does it mean take action to cherish the things that truly matter deep in our hearts?
Does it mean to move in directions that we consider worthy?
Does it mean to move in directions that we consider worthy?
Does it mean to clarify what we stand for in life and act accordingly?
Does it mean to clarify what we stand for in life and act accordingly?
It is a profound sense of a life well lived and such a life give us the full range of human emotions: pleasure, fear, sadness, anger and pain...
It is a profound sense of a life well lived and such a life give us the full range of human emotions: pleasure, fear, sadness, anger and pain...
As human beings we are all faced with the prospect of getting sick and die, sooner or later we all will loose someone close to our hearts through separation, rejection or death...
As human beings we are all faced with the prospect of getting sick and die, sooner or later we all will loose someone close to our hearts through separation, rejection or death...
We wil all come face-to-face with crisis, disappointment, failure and painful thoughts and feelings will follow us....everywhere...
We wil all come face-to-face with crisis, disappointment, failure and painful thoughts and feelings will follow us....everywhere...
We can't avoid pain, we can learn to handle it much better...
We can't avoid pain, we can learn to handle it much better...
to make room for it, rise above it and create a life worth of living.
to make room for it, rise above it and create a life worth of living.
If you love somebody deeply, you know you will feel pain, there is no way to avoid it and you still open yourself to your feelings and accept the pain as a natural part of love.
If you love somebody deeply, you know you will feel pain, there is no way to avoid it and you still open yourself to your feelings and accept the pain as a natural part of love.
Accept the painful memories, do not fear them, they happened in the past and can no longer hurt you.
Accept the painful memories, do not fear them, they happened in the past and can no longer hurt you.
No one wants to feel pain, everyone feels it. Menancing shapes half glimpsed from the corner of your vision are far more disturbing than the things we see clearly.
No one wants to feel pain, everyone feels it. Menancing shapes half glimpsed from the corner of your vision are far more disturbing than the things we see clearly.
Observe your pain, breathe into it and allow it.
Observe your pain, breathe into it and allow it.
If you are breathing, you are alive. It never stops until the day you die, use it to help you stay connected with life...a breath of fresh air, a deep sigh of relief after a stressful day...
If you are breathing, you are alive. It never stops until the day you die, use it to help you stay connected with life...a breath of fresh air, a deep sigh of relief after a stressful day...
Connect fully with your environment what can you see, hear, touch, taste and smell?Abandon the search for pain free existence, the more you try to avoid the basic fact that all human life involves pain...
Connect fully with your environment what can you see, hear, touch, taste and smell?Abandon the search for pain free existence, the more you try to avoid the basic fact that all human life involves pain...
...the more you struggle with that pain when it arises and thus you suffer even more...accept the pain just like you accept the love that inevitably comes with living...
...the more you struggle with that pain when it arises and thus you suffer even more...accept the pain just like you accept the love that inevitably comes with living...
I am coming home to myself, layer by layer, the painful issues of the past soften and resolve.
I am coming home to myself, layer by layer, the painful issues of the past soften and resolve.
I listen to many stories that are riveting, inspirational and moving. Most people have a more difficult journey that mine has been.
I listen to many stories that are riveting, inspirational and moving. Most people have a more difficult journey that mine has been.
Pain and love,
Pain and love,
not angry pain, not tearful pain, not reproachful, nto desperate...
not angry pain, not tearful pain, not reproachful, nto desperate...
Pain and love...pain and bliss.
Pain and love...pain and bliss.
As in birth as in death.
As in birth as in death.

To David J.R.


When I was a little girl,
Grandmum told me a secret:
"If you really want something,
there will be a way."
Is it angels or the power of positive thinking?
Is it determination to act
or the courage to be guided?
Between these impulses the adventure is born.

The roaring of the ocean never stops
almost everyone is struggling
colours so sharp
hot, fluffy sand
with dry, salty crust on top
the taste of tears in your mouth
the pain just doesn't go away
and you are not alone
this realization comes
when you open your eyes,
your ears and your heart
and you hear other people out.

You stop and ponder,
why should this be?

Sunshine breaking into trilions
of fragments
in the shallow
the power of money,
love and creation
living so high
falling so low
rocks meeting water
sand meeting grass
blue meeting blue on the horizon
human meeting perfection
the perfection of the human mind.

On a damp,
fog-shrouded morning
a paleoanthropologist from Madrid
stands before the entrance to El Sidron
and gingerely lowers himself into the black hole.

An underground river
had hollowed out
a deep vein of sandstone
ten minutes into the cave
he discovers 'the tunnel of bones',
the last nine Neanderthals,
five young adults
two teenagers
a child about eight
and a three year-old toddler.

All showed signs of nutritional stress
in their teeth
not unusual in young Neanderthals
late in their time on Earth.

But a deeper desparation is etched
in their bones,
they were cannibalized
by the first humans.

Whoever ate their flesh
for whatever reason
starvation
or ritual,
within days they died
the ground bellow them
suddenly collapsed
leaving little time for hyenas
to scatter the remains.

The scientist picks up
the mineralized bone
of our closest prehistoric relative
who dominated Eurasia
for 200,000 years
and with the large brains
and enormous strength
seemed equipped to face anything
on Earth,
except those modern human migrants
from Africa,
us.

Why did one kind of human being survive,
and the other disappear?

With each generation
the humans
became increasingly
skilled
at predicting
and avoiding danger,
even now
when the wilderness
was pushed away
by the modern world
our foreheads are wrinkled
by any of a million
and one other
common worries
because our mind
keeps assessing
and judging
almost everything.

We are living
in quick earning
and spending times,
most people deal with their money
the same way
how they deal with their feelings.

The lucky ones
give and receive
graciously
with a hug and a smile.
They waste money
as if not worthy
of holding onto anything
precious.

Others are insatiable,
greedy
for more and more.

And some are as tight
with their purse
as they are around their heart,
the flow of giving and receiving
is awkward
and embarrassing for them.

In the early human times
the tight ones would not survive,
if your group rejects you
it won't be long
before the wolves find you.

Is it why,
so much energy
is spent,
worrying
whether people will like us?
Always looking for ways
to improve ourselves
or putting ourselves down
because we don't measure up.

We are so sophisticated
now
we can dream up
a fantasy of a person
we would like to be
then compare our real self
to that impossible
perfect image.

Think about the ambition
of any Stone Age man,
the more
the better chance of survival,
the more food
keeps him alive
through times of scarcity
the better shelter
protects him from weather
and wild animals
the more children
gives him a chance
that some of them survive...
and our modern mind
continues to look for more:
money, status, love
new car or new house
if you succeed
you are content
for a while
until you want more....

Thus evolution has shaped our minds
that we are almost inevitably
destined to be never satisfied...

The stories of a happy childhood
are all the same,
the parents love each other,
there are children to play with
and there is a bit of nature
to have adventures.
The stories of an injured childhood
are all different,
unique,
tragic
and complicated,
just like most human lives.

When those children
will grow up,
almost half of them
will at some point
be so overwhelmed
by misery
that they seriously contemplate suicide.

With all the professional help,
advice and wordly wisdom
we can not rekindle
that sparkle of the great fire of life...

Love is radiating from every infant,
springtime,
the power of youth,
what will happen to them
at the end of summer?

We live longer than ever before
but with each extra year
we are loosing the hunger
to conquer the world.

Who knows what the future holds,
there is only hope
warm afternoon sun of mid-life
abundance of harvest
joy of sharing....

Friday, April 5, 2013

Creativity and me...


What do you do to improve your creativity?

The end of Summer - Peel Inlet

Was your childhood hapy or miserable? What did you want to be when you grew up? Do you remember when you found out there was no Santa?
Was your childhood hapy or miserable? What did you want to be when you grew up? Do you remember when you found out there was no Santa?
I have often wondered if my own answers would be really honest. But maybe once you've been honest you find out people like you for it and the world doesn't implode.
I have often wondered if my own answers would be really honest. But maybe once you've been honest you find out people like you for it and the world doesn't implode.
Adam Zwar in 'The Agony of LIfe' said: "Life is hard, love is hard, but it's all pretty funny and no-one gets out alive."
Adam Zwar in 'The Agony of LIfe' said: "Life is hard, love is hard, but it's all pretty funny and no-one gets out alive."
It is good to keep this statement close to your heart and stop taking your life and yourself so seriously. You and everything you have done and achieved will end up on a pile of dust anyway.
It is good to keep this statement close to your heart and stop taking your life and yourself so seriously. You and everything you have done and achieved will end up on a pile of dust anyway.
One doesn't have to pursue unhappiness, but you can not avoid it either, it comes to you. You come into the world screaming.
One doesn't have to pursue unhappiness, but you can not avoid it either, it comes to you. You come into the world screaming.
You cry when you're born because your lungs expand. You breathe. I think that's really kind of significant. You come into the world crying and it's a sign that you are alive.
You cry when you're born because your lungs expand. You breathe. I think that's really kind of significant. You come into the world crying and it's a sign that you are alive.
I don't know what it means 'the pursuit of happiness', all I know it is all about connection.
I don't know what it means 'the pursuit of happiness', all I know it is all about connection.
When you find someone you hate a lot, you should really look at it. It's bending toward that thing called love.
When you find someone you hate a lot, you should really look at it. It's bending toward that thing called love.
When you find someone you love, you love intensely, you should watch it. It's getting closer to its opposite.
When you find someone you love, you love intensely, you should watch it. It's getting closer to its opposite.
One of the ironies of our complicated human nature.
One of the ironies of our complicated human nature.
Our own life script is filled with that sense of wit, irony, self-deprecation...
Our own life script is filled with that sense of wit, irony, self-deprecation...
frustration and verbal richness we gathered walking our own path to fight everyday battles.
frustration and verbal richness we gathered walking our own path to fight everyday battles.
We like to share our individual life paths with people we trust and engage their sympathies alhtough that is not what we set out to do.
We like to share our individual life paths with people we trust and engage their sympathies alhtough that is not what we set out to do.
All we want is understanding.
All we want is understanding.
Our creativity help us to open the window on sensitive material, we would not touch otherwise.
Our creativity help us to open the window on sensitive material, we would not touch otherwise.
Once you have opened the window on contraversial material, it's very hard to close it, and you know your imagination gave you strength to get there....
Once you have opened the window on contraversial material, it's very hard to close it, and you know your imagination gave you strength to get there....
 You can make a poem that's the part of the current conversation.
You can make a poem that's the part of the current conversation.
Writing creatively is an opportunity to make a deep dive into content that is contemporaneous....
Writing creatively is an opportunity to make a deep dive into content that is contemporaneous....
an opportunity to reflect in a way that might make reader to feel uncomfortable and confronted....
an opportunity to reflect in a way that might make reader to feel uncomfortable and confronted....
In life there is clarity and there is ambiguity and there is a natural parallel, and there is some connective tissure there and it is ofen subconsious and not conscious.
In life there is clarity and there is ambiguity and there is a natural parallel, and there is some connective tissure there and it is ofen subconsious and not conscious.
Creative writing opens up a conversation. And it ends up with unanswered questions inviting the reader to answer them: "Where do you want to go?"
Creative writing opens up a conversation. And it ends up with unanswered questions inviting the reader to answer them: "Where do you want to go?"
"Where have you been and where do you want to go from there?"
"Where have you been and where do you want to go from there?"
I like to ask these questions myself when walking alone.
I like to ask these questions myself when walking alone.
I like melancholy. I like to pretend I am alone in the world and I am just sort of abandoned.
I like melancholy. I like to pretend I am alone in the world and I am just sort of abandoned.
In that world of total abandondment I become attracted to something, instinctively, and I research it, and my research becomes an adventure.
In that world of total abandondment I become attracted to something, instinctively, and I research it, and my research becomes an adventure.
I take you with me on my travels, everyone likes adventures...creative writing takes you there every day of your life...
I take you with me on my travels, everyone likes adventures...creative writing takes you there every day of your life...

ONE BLOND HUBBER AND HIM


"You really think this is possible?"
He asked her in a burst
of desperation
suddenly so unsure
of his ability
to fit
in this
little creative world of ours
in our hubpage writing community.


"All I have now is one blond woman who thinks I am special,"
he moaned,
wanting to be out there,
to be heard, to be seen,
so fast
so quick
is there any of us who doesn't?
He is competing every day
with thousands of others
hub aspiring writers
wishing to swim
up and down
all the time
on that endless stream
of never drying out creativity.


There was something in her
that made him want to write,
to open his heart
and tap into his imaginative side...
Can he keep it?
Can he make it?
Can you let let him in
when he knocks so urgently
on your closed doors?


Hubpages is where everyone
can have a go
and take part,
and where all are welcome,
you say,
it's where you can see new talents
getting their first break
alongside the well established hubbers.



It's one of the reasons
hubpages are so popular,
lively, fresh, diverse
and exciting,
no matter what your taste is.
Every style you can think of
is on offer,
and some you never thought
is possible!


Hub circuit is a place
where the people are super friendly
and their comments generous
and responsive.



It opens up a new field
of opportunity
for hobby writers,
but it's an experiment,
certainly.
"If I can do it,
then you can do it."
That one blond hubber
said to him.
"It feels like an old summer camp thing,
you know,
somebody starts a story
and they pass it
to the next person,
so we tend to leave
each chapter with a problem
for the other person to solve,
or the question to ask
or the comment to leave...."


"I was always taking notes
on people
like some really awful
spy,
I was just a word-obsessed kid,
now I like to read
what other hubbers think,
it is moving and exhilarating..."
she disclosed something about her,
and he ponders,
ready to answer back:
"I like to blend facts and fiction,
the lives of real-life characters,
people who I really loved
to bring them vividly
back to life..."


"Those categories for me
are clearly defined,"
she answered back,
"I think the reader needs to know
exactly where they stand.
If you are writing non-fiction,
it means
that what you are writing is true and really happened,
however extraordinary it is."


"I like to write creatively,
to be inside somebody's mind
and their emotions,
and
in a sense,
inside my mind too,
because it's what I think
of a particular situation."
He said with a big broad smile,
feeling the exhilariation
of discovery.


"I like to write
with a certain
'emotional freight'
as a writer
it doesn't confine
where my imagination
will go,"
she replied,
"Tell me more about you,
tell me what are you thinking about
right now?"



She imagined him
sitting in a room
and he would look so sad,
so unsure of himself,
so beaten up,
but then,
he would start to tell
a story
and suddenly
he would come to life
and he would get funnier and funnier,
and his eyes would twinkle,
and his voice
would take on
whatever mood he was exploring...
always in motion...
always
full of
deep thouhts
and feelings...


She closed her eyes
to see those living people
he described
and their courage.
It was an act of empathy,
she listened
and imagined,
what that must have been like
for them
to a greater or a lesser degree.
So there are the facts
of his story
and there is how
that affects her
and how she can imagine
the life of another human being.


The one blond hubber
opened her eyes again
and started to write,
imagining herself
into those lives
without any break,
completely freely,
completely creatively.


Words radiant with tenderness
and empathy
for the human condition,
the language animated
by the need
to understand
the nature of desire
in all its form.


It was like a mysterious
electrical current
running through the sentences,
she sent the words to him
and he caught the writing fever too....


There is a whole lot of emotional energy
that comes
for everyone.
from our childhoods
and from what happened to us
and from how we are constructed,
he closed his eyes and started to play his guitar.


A psychological engine
of before,
nuclear reaction of now,
creating a kind of intensity
between them,
inside them
feeding each other
constantly
with wonders of a brilliant sunset
and impossibly large full moon
that never ceases to shine,
will it be large enough
to sustain their creativity?